Category: Prayer

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“I Don’t Deserve This”

How do I know if I am self-righteous? I’m concerned with Christian counselees that are focused on their own good deeds, but don’t realize it. For this blog I’m defining self-righteousness as the belief that I have earned some favor with God through my behavior, character, thoughts, or deeds. So how would I know if I’m self-righteous? What would one symptom be?

There might be a few tests, but one is this: do you believe you don’t deserve your past or present suffering? Let me clarify. I’m not saying that if you were sinned against by another person, that you must agree that you deserved that from them. “Kraig, my friend betrayed me and stabbed me in the back. I didn’t do anything to them. I didn’t deserve that.” Yes, on a human scale—peer-to-peer—there are things that we don’t deserve. That happens all the time. A husband may yell at his family when it’s completely unprovoked. An employer may fire you just because he can and you didn’t deserve that. You could even be accused of a crime and go through the court system when you are not guilty.

But if you look at your past or present trials and believe that you don’t deserve them, then you are probably self-righteous. Here’s why I believe I can say that. In order to think that you don’t deserve what has been providentially brought into your life, you must believe also that you have lived in a way that deserves better from God. You are living by a spiritual formula that says good Christians don’t suffer the way you’re suffering. You’re a good Christian, so God owes you the easy, blessed life. God has disappointed you.

But that’s incorrect. What do each of us deserve because of our sin? We deserve hell. Isn’t anything less than hell—even suffering and trials—better than what we deserve? So God owes you nothing. And God has given you a lot! He’s already given you everything in Christ. You have all spiritual blessings in Christ.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, Eph 1:3 (NASB95)

Any good, and I mean any good thing in your life has come from God.

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. Jam 1:17 (NASB95)

So he’s given you a lot of good that you don’t deserve. You cannot plead that you don’t deserve this or that suffering.

Now maybe you object that King David seemed to plead with God in several psalms that he didn’t deserve what he was facing. It does seem that way. But I think we find that David pleads for God’s mercy. Mercy by definition is undeserved.

David pleaded God’s mercy after his adultery with Bathsheba. Of course this is David’s psalm of repentance so he was acknowledging his sin. He knew he didn’t deserve God’s mercy.

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Psalm 51:1 (ESV)

But we see other examples of David pleading for mercy. David prayed for God’s mercy when he fled from Saul. He didn’t claim that he didn’t deserve this since he was God’s servant and therefore God should change his circumstances. No, he asked God for mercy.

Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for in you my soul takes refuge; in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge, till the storms of destruction pass by. Psalm 57:1 (ESV)

In Psalm 86 David prays for God’s mercy.

But You, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, Slow to anger and abundant in lovingkindness and truth. Turn to me, and be gracious to me; Oh grant Your strength to Your servant, And save the son of Your handmaid. Psalm 86:15–16 (NASB95)

David seems to do both in this psalm: point out he deserves help and also pray for mercy.

Preserve my soul, for I am a godly man; O You my God, save Your servant who trusts in You. Be gracious to me, O Lord, For to You I cry all day long. Psalm 86:2–3 (NASB95)

So David claims he is a godly man, but he also asks God for grace. His godliness didn’t mean he was undeserving of his circumstances. He knew he needed God’s mercy, and he asked for it.

Jeremiah hoped in God’s mercy after describing his own suffering in poetic detail.

This I recall to my mind, Therefore I have hope. The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. Lam 3:21–23 (NASB95)

Can you ask God to end your trial? Of course you can. But we don’t demand anything from God as if we deserve better than what we’re facing. We cannot make that claim. Thankfully God is abundantly merciful, and it’s his mercy we plead when we pray, not our deserving better circumstances.

So if your regular thought has been how you deserve better than what you’ve experienced, maybe you’re self-righteous. At least consider that you might be. And if so, you should repent of your self-righteousness. It’s better to plead God’s mercy anyway. His compassions fail not Jeremiah tells us. His mercies are renewed every morning. And we can come confidently to him and ask for mercy. Confidently?! Yes, confidently!

Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Heb 4:16 (NASB95)
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A Pastoral Prayer

Each Sunday morning I pray publicly for the congregation. My own devotional time, Scripture reading, and Christian reading provide some thoughts each week. I want to pray genuinely and also teach my congregation how to pray. For example, I want them to understand how to confess sin in prayer. Here’s one from a few weeks ago.

Dear Father, Our hearts have so many other loves, but only one is necessary—Jesus. Like Martha we are distressed and moved about by many things, but one thing is needful—time with Jesus. Remind us again this morning of Jesus’ love for us, and help us love Jesus most of all.

God, Ephesians describes you as rich in mercy. Some here this morning may think that’s good poetry but not true in their lives. Some bear more of the marks of a sin-cursed world than others. They’ve been mistreated, betrayed, attacked, diminished, and hurt. And it’s easy to wonder where is the evidence of your mercy in their life. But Father, the evidence of your mercy is your mistreated, betrayed, [and] attacked Son who died for us. And through his death we all know your mercy.

God, we have hearts that are stubborn and hard. Please make us pliable and teachable. We need your truth. You tell us that your Word is a light for our path and a lamp unto our feet. We need spiritual truth to make sense of life and yet we don’t seek your Word and we don’t listen when it’s presented to us. Soften our stubborn hearts this morning. May your truth sung and preached be used by the Holy Spirit to change us.

Father, don’t let our worship this morning to be perfunctory, habitual, dead. Instead may our worship be passionate, fervent, earnest, and intense. We are able to work up excitement and emotion on our own, but only you can give us genuine worship. So banish any thoughts except those that are focused on you. Eliminate any distractions that would keep us from thinking about you. May we be thrilled with you this morning.

Your Word says that people love darkness rather than light because their deeds are evil. We need to be people that live in the light. First John tells us to walk in the light and it ties that to confessing sin regularly. So Lord, convict us when we hide our sin. We hide it by not admitting we’re wrong to others and to you. We hide it by actually keeping it secret from others. Convict us and let us know the sweet forgiveness that comes when we admit our sin.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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National Day of Prayer: for the Churches

I was asked to pray in Stevens County’s National Day of Prayer today, May 2nd. When asked, there were still a few subjects left, and I chose our community churches because it seemed one of the easiest in which to talk about the gospel. Here’s how I prayed at a community event in a way that was my attempt to be faithful to Christ.

Gracious Father,

Strong churches help us have a strong community. I’m thankful for those churches that are especially involved in serving our community’s physical needs. There are churches that provide free meals, that help the homeless, that encourage the addicted, that stand for life. Colville is better because of them and we thank you for them.

God, the church is an institution invented by you for the discipleship of your people and for the evangelization of the world. I pray that our churches will faithfully share the gospel. Our county needs Christ most of all. He changes people. He changed the Apostle Paul from a murderer into a missionary.

May those churches that love and share the gospel stay faithful to the Bible message. The good news needs to be known by all in Stevens County. May more and more realize they are sinners and that their sin separates them from a holy God. May they know that You must punish sin; you cannot wink at it or pretend it away since that would violate your nature. May they realize that Jesus was sent to live a perfect life and die in our place. A death that is substitutionary and effective for all who repent and believe. May our churches add nothing to the finished work of Christ on the cross. It is only by grace that we are saved.

Father, we need the words of life. We need the timeless truth of your Holy Word. So especially strengthen the pastors of our churches who labor long at understanding Scripture and teaching it to our congregations. May they preach the truth even if they are opposed. May they continue to be faithful to you.

I pray that our churches would get better at the one anothers of Scripture. The church should be different than the world. It should be a place where we love one another, forgive one another, bear with one another, live in harmony with one another, serve one another, be kind and compassionate to one another, admonish one another, encourage and edify one another, and so many more. Those are supposed to happen in our churches, and I pray they will.

Father, if anyone wants to be your disciple, Jesus said we must deny ourselves, take up our cross, and follow you. May our churches produce more and better disciples of Jesus Christ.

God, you describe the church as a body in 1 Corinthians. It’s a picture that represents how each church needs every member. May our members faithfully attend, serve, and support our churches. If the entire body isn’t there, if the entire body isn’t serving, our local church bodies will limp along.

You also describe the church as a family when you call us the household of faith in Gal 6:10 and when you tell us to treat each other as fathers, mothers, brothers, and sisters in 1 Tim 5:1. Lord, families function best when they are not at war with each other. May we give each other grace, may we obey Scripture, and reconcile with each other. May our churches be marked by forgiveness of each other because we know we have been forgiven by God. May our church families be loving families. May we treat each other with the kindness, love, and grace that is the mark of the best of families.

May our churches be truly healthy. Spiritual health isn’t measured by how large our auditoriums are, or how big our offerings are, or how many people attend. Spiritual health is measured by how faithful we are to the Bible. I pray our churches in Colville will be more faithful to Scripture.  

In our Risen Savior, Jesus’ name, Amen

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Don’t Worry Be Happy

Or Could There Be a Better Way to Address Anxiety?

In every life we have some trouble
But when you worry you make it double
Don’t worry, be happy
Don’t worry, be happy now

Bobby McFerrin sang it in 1988, and the song was a grammy award winner, so it must be the way to deal with worry. Just stop worrying. Just decide to be happy. Hmm. Or maybe not.

So if not that bouncy advice, then what? One way to get help with worry seems like no help at all at first, and that’s to ask the question, is there a link between anxiety and pride?

Maybe even asking the question seems a bit offensive. For some Christians anxiety seems like something that comes over you—from outside. It’s a mental health issue and more and more people recognize the need for mental health breaks—entertainers and even athletes have made it acceptable. The theory claims that we didn’t ask for the anxiety, so we cannot have responsibility for it.

This view is akin to anxiety being like a virus that comes from outside and makes us sick, or it’s like a genetic condition that we inherited. Some people are just wired by personality or background to be more anxious than others. In other words, we think of worry as something that happens to us, not necessarily something we do. Or at least we think of the extreme types of anxiety as coming upon us from the outside. And if it comes from outside of us, how could it be related to pride at all?

I’m using anxiety and worry as synonymous terms. Some see anxiety as distinct from worry,[1]Maybe because the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders describes it and therefore, professional counselors talk about it as a medical condition. but I believe that what we call anxiety Scripture calls worry. Seeing them as distinct results in Christians assuming worry is sin, but anxiety isn’t. Anxiety might not be sin in all cases, but in some it must be. The Apostle Paul says,

do not be anxious about anything…. Phil 4:6a (ESV)

And that is a command. So, we can be compassionate, sympathetic, and understand some nuance is necessary to apply Phil 4:6, but we cannot claim that anxiety is never sin. Some must be or else why would Paul command us not to be anxious about anything?

So… is it possible that worry/anxiety is related to pride? Us worriers (I’m the worrier in my family. My wife seems incapable of worry 😉 ) don’t like to consider this.

1 Peter 5:6–7 (ESV) Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Verse 6 commands humility and verse 7 talks about worry. First Peter 5:6-7 are one sentence in the Greek New Testament, so verses 6 and 7 have to be related thoughts somehow. Isn’t this a strange juxtaposition?

But how are humility and worry related? We tend to think of anxiety as something that cannot be helped. It’s the view of your heart being passive, rather than active. But Scripture doesn’t describe humanity that way. The Bible says that your sin comes from inside of you (Mk 7:20-23.) When it’s actually sin, it’s not something that comes upon you from the outside that you cannot prevent. When we’re talking about sin, we’re talking about something that is inside of you—it comes from your heart.

You have a dynamic heart that responds to circumstances and situations around you. Sometimes the way a person responds is with worry and anxiety. And 1 Peter 5:6-7 is saying that at least some worry is a manifestation of pride.

Is that hard to swallow? I think it might even be rude to some of us that are great worriers. If that characterization offends you, well, just look at 1 Peter 5:6-7. The humble cast their cares on God. That means the proud don’t. They worry over them.

So if worry is linked to pride as the Apostle Peter says, how might we see that link? I think there are three beliefs and three resulting accusations against God that show the link between pride and anxiety.

  • Worry is the belief that God can’t take care of it so I must do it myself—God is impotent. [God can do lots of things, but I guess not this.]

The worrier says that were I all-powerful, I would handle this far better than God does. He’s loving and wise, but I guess not powerful. I would do it better.

  • Worry is the belief that God won’t take care of it at all—God is apathetic. [If God cared, he would deal with this. I guess he doesn’t care.]

Who will care for me if I don’t worry about these things? God will. That’s what verse 7 says. You can give him your cares because he cares for you.

Think about how astounding that claim is. What world religion teaches that God cares for you? I think only Christianity (and maybe Judaism). Islam doesn’t; Hinduism doesn’t; Buddhism doesn’t. Christianity says that God actually cares for you. Your concerns out of 7 billion people on this piece of dust we call earth in the vast expanse of the universe matter to God. Yes, they do. Put your concerns on God. He cares for you.

  • Worry is the belief that God won’t take care of it my way—God is unkind. [God will take care of it, but he won’t consider what I want. That’s not compassionate. That’s not kind.]

We’re told to bring our cares to God in verse 7, but no one would tell his concerns to someone cruel or unkind. But someone that cares for you…. And God is kind; he does care for you. In our pride we think we are the only ones that care about ourselves, but that’s not true. God cares. And his kindness makes the difference.

These three beliefs are all actually arrogance, aren’t they? “Well God won’t handle it as I want it, so I must do it myself. I know best.” Are you god or is God, God? He is not about making your kingdom work. He wants you to submit to his providential rule in your life. He is King.

Anxiety seems like something that comes over us, but Peter makes clear that anxiety is often pride. It doesn’t come from without—our circumstances. It comes from within. You will never grow in your battle with worry as long as you won’t admit it’s coming out of your heart.

But… it’s okay because God cares for you! That’s the promise of verse 7. So we have far more than Don’t Worry Be Happy. We have a God that cares; He actually cares!

References

References
↑1 Maybe because the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders describes it and therefore, professional counselors talk about it as a medical condition.
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I Could Always Get My Dad

When my dad was a young pastor, he had a few standing rules, but the most important one to me was that if his wife or sons called, we were immediately put through to him. The church secretary knew that no matter what he was doing or whom he was with, he always wanted to take the call. I’m sure the policy was designed especially for my mother, so she could be certain that whatever family emergency her elementary school-age boys caused, she could get her husband. But it applied to all of us.

My Dad at groundbreaking for a church building. It’s the late ’70s; that explains the shoes. 😉

Probably the only rebuke our church secretary ever received (she was a gem) was after I called one time, and she tried to screen if the probably 12-year-old son of the pastor really needed to talk to his dad or not, and she didn’t put me through. From then on, no matter why I called, she just put me through to my dad. She didn’t even ask why I was calling; she just got my dad on the phone.

Having been a pastor myself, I realize it might not have been a wise policy. I’m sure we interrupted my dad’s study, counseling, and other important pastoral tasks. It’s funny how that affected me. No matter where I was, if I could find a phone, I could get my dad. In an age before cell phones or even the internet, knowing I could grab that harvest gold phone off the wall, dial the church office, and immediately talk to my Dad made me feel special, privileged—membership in my dad’s family had its privileges. I could always get through.

But as comforting as that was, I have a greater Father who has the same policy. When God the Father saved me, he adopted me. I am a member of his family. I’m not a stranger; I’m not an outsider.

he [God] predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will…. Ephesians 1:5 (ESV) Cf. Rom 8:14-17; Gal 4:6

Membership has its privileges. The only prayer of the unbeliever that God has obligated himself to hear is the prayer of repentance. But for the believer, God always hears our prayers.

For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” 1 Peter 3:12 (ESV)

I might have milked the privilege being Harley Keck’s son afforded me and made phone calls that were unnecessary, but my dad still took my calls. And our heavenly Father encourages us to come boldly before him.

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 (ESV)

I am adopted into God’s family. This means I can always get through. How amazing that the God who spoke the universe into existence always, always hears my prayer. And I don’t have to find a harvest-gold phone to talk to him. 😉 Right now, you and I can talk to him. We are so privileged.