Author: Kraig

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Lost then Found

There’s a story to this picture. This past weekend we were driving to see our son in Colorado when we pulled off the interstate for a minute. My wife was sleeping, and my daughter was driving when we were in the middle of nowhere in Northeastern Colorado. The exits on that stretch of interstate are about 10 miles apart. It’s a desolate area. It was one stop on a long, 11-hour drive. We arrived at our hotel that night and while we were getting our luggage my wife told me she could only find one shoe. I had noticed her shoes when I got out earlier in our journey, but I thought I was careful; however, one shoe was missing. Laura walked to our room with only one shoe on—she really did! I was sorry, but there was nothing I could do. They weren’t expensive, but they were new shoes.  

We had a great weekend, dropped our daughter at the airport, our son back at school, and we hit the road. My daughter told us that she thought we were about 2:20 from our hotel when we stopped. Our hotel was south of Denver so Laura plugged in the address and tried to figure out what exit we might have stopped at. She offered to drive and we arrived at the exit where she thought we might find her shoe. We pulled off the road and there was her shoe, sparkling in the sunlight. We were both so thrilled—my wife because her detective work paid off and me because the shoe I accidentally kicked out of the minivan was found undamaged. Some lost things are found.

I’ve been thinking a little about finding things that are lost. My son texted me this week that he needed his social security card. I went to the place in the house where I keep them, and it wasn’t there. I found passports, birth certificates, and other social security cards, but not his. Laura and I looked all around in every place we could imagine, and we never found it. Some lost things are never found.

My wife’s shoe did nothing to be found. It was in exactly the same spot as when it fell out of the car three days previous. And I know my son’s social security card hasn’t done anything to be found because we haven’t found it!

Every person alive today was lost; some have been found. But if you were found, it’s all because of Christ. You did nothing to be found.

For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost. Luke 19:10 (ESV)

I’m glad Jesus sought me and saved me. I’m glad salvation doesn’t depend upon me. If it did, I’d still be lost—like my son’s social security card.

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Union with Christ 2–Implications

It’s beneficial to discuss the theology of our union with Christ as we’ve already done, but sometimes we struggle to understand the implications of this doctrine. Your counselees will probably need help to see how applicable it is to their lives. Our union with Christ is not just a theoretical doctrine. It has real application for you and your counselees.

Union with Christ Affects Our Identity

I think this is especially powerful. Our world finds their identities in many things. The LGBTQ+ movement finds its identity in its behavior, and if you reject the behavior, they feel you are rejecting them. If your identity is as a homosexual, then it’s going to feel personal when someone claims the Bible calls that behavior sin. That’s because your identity is very personal.

Many things we choose for our identity can be distractions from what our identity ought to be. I am a parent, but I shouldn’t find my identity in that. If I do, it could distract me from pursuing Christ. It could keep me from having the marriage I should have.

Other things can weigh us down if they become our identities. Your identity isn’t found in your past failures. That’s not how God sees you. He sees you as righteous because of your union with Christ. Maybe you see yourself as…

  • A failed parent
  • An ex-adulterer
  • A former drunk
  • A failure at marriage
  • A failure as a son or daughter
  • An embarrassment to your family

But none of those are how God looks at His children. He sees you as righteous and only has love for you. Why? Because of your union with Christ.

Romans 8:1 (ESV) There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Because of this judicial union with Christ, we have a right standing before the law. We have the righteousness of God’s own Son. You need to cast off those identities you have that weigh you down or distract you from following Christ. You are in Christ and He is in you.

You might wear a lot of identities in your life: son, daughter, student, athlete, employee, spouse, parent, grandparent, and others. None of those are your true identity. Those other identities can be stripped away. They can change. They can actually be disappointments. You are in Christ and He is in you. That’s your identity.

Your identity isn’t your gender, your shame, your hobby, your talent, your personality, or anything else we use to scratch out a significant identity. You are in union with Christ. Your identity is found in Him.

And since that’s because of grace—you didn’t earn it; you also cannot lose it. God gave you that identity, and He won’t take it back.

Union with Christ Affects Our Fellowship with Christ

I think this is unexpected, and I like this truth about our union with Christ.

Matthew 18:20 (ESV) For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”
Matthew 28:20 (ESV) teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
1 Corinthians 1:9 (ESV) God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.

Understanding our union with Christ has a very personal application. Your fellowship with Jesus depends on it. It’s guaranteed by it.

1 John 1:6–7, 9 (ESV) If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Yes, walking in the light will increase our fellowship with each other (1:7), but if verse 6 means anything—and even the entire passage (1:5-2:2)—then we can have greater or lesser fellowship with God.

Union with Christ brings about a fellowship of Christ with the believer, –Christ takes part in all the labors, temptations, and sufferings of his people; a fellowship of the believer with Christ, –so that Christ’s whole experience on earth is in some measure reproduced in him; a fellowship of all believers with one another, –furnishing a basis for the spiritual unity of Christ’s people on earth, and for the eternal communion of heaven. [1]Augustus Strong, 806

“Christ takes part in all the labors, temptations, and sufferings of his people….” What a tremendous comfort. We might say it this way, “Jesus is with you.” No matter what your circumstances are union with Christ means that He’s with you.

Union with Christ Affects Our Growth

Romans 6:11–14, 19 (ESV) So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. 12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. 13 Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. 14 For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace. 19 I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification.

Why are we dead to sin as 6:11 says? Because we died with Christ (Rom 6:6). How could we have possibly died with him? It must be through our union with Christ. And having died with Christ, we are no longer enslaved to sin. Sin cannot dominate us anymore! We used to grow in lawlessness, but now we can grow in holiness.

It’s only through Christ that we can bear fruit. It’s not by muscling up our own willpower to defeat sin. We learn this in John 15. You cannot grow on your own. You cannot bear good fruit on your own. You can because of Christ.

John 15:4–5 (ESV) Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.

Union with Christ is what allows us to bear fruit. We live in Christ’s strength. You have no ability through your willpower or innate ability to change yourself in a way that pleases God. You cannot produce good fruit outside of Christ. Christ in you and you in Christ—that’s our union with Christ.

Union with Christ secures to the believer the continuously transforming, assimilating power of Christ’s life, –first, for the soul; secondly, for the body, –consecrating it in the present, and in the future raising it up in the likeness of Christ’s glorified body. This continuous influence, so far as it is exerted in the present life, we call Sanctification, the human side of which is Perseverance. [2]Augustus Strong, 805

Don’t believe me or Augustus Strong? Look at these passages.

Galatians 2:20 (ESV) I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Romans 15:18 (ESV) For I will not venture to speak of anything except what Christ has accomplished through me to bring the Gentiles to obedience—by word and deed,
Philippians 4:13 (ESV) I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

This is where we get practical help to live a life that glorifies God. All of us know how we should live. Our union with Christ means that we can live the way we should.

Your sanctification will not rise and fall on your spiritual abilities. Yes, you need to work, but you grow because of Christ. Abiding in Him is the power source for growth.

Identity, fellowship, and growth are three practical implications of our union with Christ.

References

References
↑1 Augustus Strong, 806
↑2 Augustus Strong, 805
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Pastor, You Must Counsel

My first job after seminary was for a small Christian publishing house. Editing tasks and even some writing were in my job description. We only had about 15 employees, and we did it all: writing, editing, layout, printing, collating, binding, shipping, sales, and conferences. From start to finish we published our own curriculum. And twice a year we shut down production to do inventory; the entire staff participated. Everything had to be counted by hand; it was exhausting and boring work. I hated it. It took a long time, didn’t seem to yield visible results, and I didn’t understand it’s importance. It certainly seemed like it wasn’t a necessary part of my job description.

Sometimes pastors look at counseling like I looked at inventorying. It’s hard work that seems to yield few results, and it doesn’t seem like a significant part of their job description. And, therefore, many pastors don’t counsel. Their hearts sink a little bit when a member wants to meet with them and they suspect they want counsel. They would rather refer them to a counselor outside the church or assign another pastor the counseling task. While a counseling pastor can be a great hire, I will argue that lead pastors should still counsel. I want to make the case that every pastor—especially lead pastors—should counsel.

So, Pastor, why should you counsel your members?

Because ALL Christians Should Counsel

Romans 15:14 (ESV) I myself am satisfied about you, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able to instruct one another.

Jay Adams titled his first book, Competent to Counsel, from the phrase in this verse, “able to instruct one another.” He points out that the Apostle Paul was not addressing the leaders of the Roman church. No, he was talking to the average Christian in the congregation. Every believer is able to admonish/instruct/counsel another. It’s part of one-another ministry.

So if this is one way that believers minister to each other, then it’s also a way that pastors minister to their members—other believers. Most believers will do it informally, but pastors have the privilege of also doing formal counseling.

Because Counseling Is Shepherding

Acts 20:31 (ESV) Therefore be alert, remembering that for three years I did not cease night or day to admonish every one with tears.

In Acts 20 Paul has already claimed that he ministered in large and small groups (20:20). Now Paul claims that he did one-to-one ministry. A pastor that doesn’t counsel isn’t really shepherding his flock. Counseling is one way that you shepherd. You’re called pastors—that is, shepherds.

And shepherding is hard work. Jesus thought so.

Matthew 18:12–14 (ESV) What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? 13 And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. 14 So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.

A shepherd doesn’t say, “I’ve got 99 sheep; that’s enough.” If you don’t want to counsel, you don’t want to pastor. Counseling is one way that you pursue the sheep that runs.

Deepak Reju says, “What’s presumed here is both that the sheep view their pastor as approachable and that the pastor deliberately affords time in his schedule to get down into the weeds of life and walk alongside the sheep.” [1]Bob Kellemen and Kevin Carson, Biblical Counseling and the Church: God’s Care Through God’s People. (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2015), 49.

Shepherding is not really done from the pulpit. It’s being approachable; it’s rolling up your sleeves and working in someone’s life. Counseling gets you down with the sheep; it gives you opportunities to love your sheep—to do some tender shepherding. Do you have time in your schedule to mix with the sheep? Yes counseling is hard and time consuming, but it’s also what a shepherd does.

Because Counseling Helps You Know Your Congregation

For about 15 years of my life I was in churches that had at least yearly evangelistic meetings. A full time evangelist would come and preach each night for about a week. It occurred to me at times that this evangelist really didn’t know our community and our church since he swooped in for a week and then left for the next church. He would tell us night after night to invite our friends and relatives when too many of us weren’t even admitting we were Christians to our friends and relatives. He would sell a Scripture memorization system he published when most men in the church weren’t even reading their Bibles regularly, much less memorizing them.

The pastor that counsels people in his congregation will know his congregation. He’ll realize their marriage concerns; he’ll know their struggles with children and teenagers. He’ll know what it’s like at work for them. Since your counselees are normally a cross section of your congregation, you can extrapolate what you learn to your entire congregation. Don’t be the pastor that thinks preaching affords him an intimate connection with his congregation. Those guys in the ivory tower are often respected for their exegesis, but not for their relationships in the congregation.

Because Counseling Improves Your Preaching and Teaching

The more you counsel, the more you know people. The better you know people, the better informed your preaching is. Some have said that preaching involves exegeting the passage and also exegeting your people. Counseling helps you exegete people. It’s more likely that your lessons and sermons will reach the hearts of your people; they will be more applicable. Your illustrations will communicate truth better because you actually know where your congregation is spiritually and what types of struggles they have. Your illustrations and applications will have punch.

Because Counseling Humbles You

Many pastors are encouraged by listeners’ comments after their sermons. People come by and express appreciation for that sermon. “Pastor, that’s exactly what I needed today.” It’s great that God’s people can be so thankful and kind, but a steady diet of compliments can deceive a pastor into thinking he’s a far better communicator than he actually is. Or he can believe that he’s actually more important to God’s work in this congregation than he really is.

In general people don’t tend to grow as fast as you, the pastor, think they should. And counseling reminds you that the Spirit, the Scripture, and the Church are far more important resources than you are.

David Powlison says you should work with some slow-movers when you are the lead pastor. Counseling people whose growth seems painstakingly slow can increase your patience, and it also humbles you. Why? Because you aren’t that great at teaching truth. You labor over it with this person, and they continue to struggle. They don’t get it, and they don’t get it easily even when they are being tutored by the pastor. Preaching without counseling can fool us into thinking that we communicate Scriptural truth really well. Sitting down with a struggling couple can remind us that unless the Lord builds the house, we labor in vain.

Because Counseling Builds Relationships

When you retire or move on to another ministry, your people will probably not remember any particular sermon you preached. And that’s true even if they generally appreciated your preaching. But some will remember how you counseled them at the worst time in their lives. You were there when their child committed suicide. You were there when their marriage was in shambles. You were there when they got the dreaded cancer diagnosis. And you showed them from Scripture how God wanted them to live. Hopefully your church will appreciate your ministry, but some… some will know you tirelessly met with them until they were growing and thriving. And they will be some of your closest relationships.

Pastors, you’re missing out if you’re not counseling people in your congregation. Never get so busy that you offload that responsibility entirely to other people in your church or someone outside of your church. You need to counsel your people.

References

References
↑1 Bob Kellemen and Kevin Carson, Biblical Counseling and the Church: God’s Care Through God’s People. (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2015), 49.
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Union with Christ 1–Identity

I don’t think I’ve ever been to a costume party. I mean maybe I went to one when I was a kid, but not recently. I suppose the church equivalent is youth group theme nights or Christian school spirit weeks, and I’ve participated in those, but never a real costume party. However, if TV is to be believed, that’s a common experience for the rest of America because it’s a regular plot point of movies and TV.

The point of a costume party is to assume an identity not your own. Too often believers forget their identity in Christ and assume identities that aren’t really their own. It makes me wonder if you and your counselees think about your identity in Christ much, and how important it is for Christian living.

Adults try to find their identity in lots of things: sports, education, work, sexual choices, hobbies, and even shame from sin they’ve committed or has been committed against them. God knows those things about you, but that’s not your identity.

1 Corinthians 6:15–18 (ESV) Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! 16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. 18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.

This passage tells us to flee immorality in part because we are members of Christ’s body. In 1 Corinthians 6:15-18 Paul takes the doctrine of union with Christ and point out its application to our physical bodies. You have a union with Christ if you are saved. Therefore, you can’t be joined to a prostitute. Your body and soul belong to Christ. Sex outside of marriage—even if it were merely physical—would still be wrong because you are joining your body to that person. But there is something going on in immorality that is more than just physical. It contradicts Christ’s lordship over your body, and being in union with Christ means your body is his body.

We learn about our union with Christ from the many passages in the New Testament that talk about believers and Christ. Some passages describe us as being in Christ.

2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV) Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (cf. Eph 1:3-4, 6-7)

Other passages claim that Christ is in us.

Colossians 1:27 (ESV) To them God chose to make known how great among the Gentiles are the riches of the glory of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. (cf. Gal 2:20)

And some passages say both.

1 John 4:13 (ESV) By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit.

So what does union with Christ mean? One theologian defined it this way,

Union with Christ is a phrase used to summarize several different relationships between believers and Christ, through which Christians receive every benefit of salvation. These relationships include the fact that we are in Christ, Christ is in us, we are like Christ, and we are with Christ. [1]Wayne Grudem, Systematic Theology (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1994), 840.

Union with Christ means that we are credited with all of Christ’s righteousness and holiness. It’s our union with Christ that allows God the Father to look at us as righteous rather than sinners deserving of His wrath. As the song by Chris Anderson says,

His robes for mine: O wonderful exchange!
Clothed in my sin, Christ suffered ‘neath God’s rage.
Draped in His righteousness, I’m justified.
In Christ I live, for in my place He died.

His robes for mine: what cause have I for dread?
God’s daunting Law Christ mastered in my stead.
Faultless I stand with righteous works not mine,
Saved by my Lord’s vicarious death and life.

This is great news! No matter how shameful your past, God can flood you with his favor because you are in Christ.

And Christ’s teaching in John 15 of the vine and the branches adds to our understanding too. Union with Christ is what allows us to bear fruit. You have no ability through your willpower or innate skill to change yourself in a way that pleases God. You cannot produce good fruit outside of Christ. Christ in you and you in Christ—that’s our union with Christ.

So what is your identity? You are in Christ and He is in you. Your identity is found in Christ. It’s not found in sports or music or family or money or appearance or failure or anything else. You are in Christ and, therefore, able to bear good fruit. You can be different. You can change. You can grow. And it’s because you are in Christ.

References

References
↑1 Wayne Grudem, Systematic Theology (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1994), 840.
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It Kinda Looks Like Biblical Growth, but…

My oldest daughter famously found her mother’s lipstick when she was about two years old, and she thought she knew what to do with it. I remember sitting in front of my desktop computer as she glided into the den with lipstick approximately on her lips. Clearly she didn’t know exactly where her lips were. She thought she looked so growny (a Southern expression that means grown up), but she actually looked like a cute little kid. It kinda looked like growth, but it wasn’t.

For the biblical counselor, not just any change will do. It’s possible for your counselee to experience change that doesn’t glorify God but does kinda look like real spiritual growth. It happens all the time with unbelievers. AA does help many quit drinking which is a net benefit to society. I’m thankful for every drunk that quits drinking. But it isn’t change that glorifies God.

And our change does need to honor God. Listen to how Paul prays for the Philippian believers.

Philippians 1:9–11 (ESV) And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, 10 so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

Paul expected Christians to grow (cf. Col. 1:9-11). He says in verse 11 that the type of change that he is praying for results in the glory and praise of God. It’s possible for your counselee to change in a way that doesn’t glorify God. There are all sorts of ways to change that don’t result in praise and honor for God. Here are some examples.

Substitutes For Biblical Change

Change by willpower—I can do it myself. Lots of Christians attempt to change themselves this way, and some succeed. But it’s not change that glorifies God. Pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps glorifies you, not God. Some very disciplined counselees seem to accomplish this. However, when you change by your own willpower, you proclaim that you don’t need God’s grace.

Change through circumstances—I will be different if I am in a different situation. “If my wife would get off of my back, I wouldn’t get so angry.” “If we just had separate bank accounts, my wife and I wouldn’t argue about the finances.” Changing jobs, changing churches, or changing families doesn’t change you.

Change by spookiness—“I will just let go and let God. I don’t have to do anything; God will magically change me.” Hmm…I think God gave us a lot of commands in the New Testament that he expects us to work at obeying. Another more subtle version might be, “I will pray really hard that God would change me.” Good, but not enough.

Change by decision—I lay it all on the altar. I make a series of decisions during revivals or missions conference or other special services at my church. But a decision is just the beginning of the change process. It is not change itself.

Change by man-centered means—self-esteem or other worldly theories. “If I just felt better about myself, I wouldn’t do that.”

Change by exchange—This is a popular one. This is where you just trade one idol for a more socially acceptable one. You quit finding your comfort in food and now you find it in eating right and dieting. You’re the poster boy for good health, but all you’ve done is rearrange the furniture of your life. You quit finding your comfort in shopping and now you find it in how well you manage your finances. You quit finding your escape in alcohol, and now you find it in mindlessly watching YouTube videos. You’ve exchanged one way of obtaining your idol for another one, but you haven’t given up your idolatry.

None of these methods are the story of sanctification. Most of them are unbiblical. Therefore, we cannot use them to change ourselves or our counselees.

So what is God-glorifying spiritual growth? Well that needs to be the subject of another blog, but what we can say is there is a human-divine dynamic in spiritual growth. God prunes us (John 15:2), but growth is not one-dimensional—it’s not all about what God does. Every Christian has a responsibility too; we must put effort into our growth. Always being dependent upon God to change us, but it only happens as we work at it. You work hard, but you have never changed yourself. It’s always been God’s work in you. It’s responsible dependence.

We see that clearly in Colossians 1:29 (cf. Phil 2:12-13) where Paul says, For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully works within me. (ESV)

Christian growth is never the two things we want it to be: fast and easy. And maybe that’s why some of those substitutes are so tempting. They promise a quicker route to growth. But it takes hard work. Why else would the Christian life be described as a walk (Gal 5:16), a race (1 Cor 9:24-27), a wrestling match (Eph 6:10-12), and a fight (2 Tim 4:6-7)? Each of those metaphors pictures struggle and difficulty and effort.

Don’t take shortcuts to spiritual growth that aren’t really growth after all. Make sure your counselees understand their dependence upon God and their responsibility to God.